What kind of habits you obtain will make the kind of life you will be. Forming good habits requires making lasting positive changes. In this process, what you really have to rely on is not willpower and self-control, but the subconscious behavior that you do directly without thinking. It’s an action you have to take, and not just a thought in your mind.
In a book about “Complete Habits to Create Your Ideal Life”, the author Takeshi Furukawa mentioned the “Habit iceberg model” and it is believed that there are still thinking habits and emotional habits hidden under the visible behavior habits. Only by changing the hidden habits under the “sea surface” can we change behavior habits and then change our lives.
The author summarizes his practical experience in habit-shaping guidance for many years, summarizes 65 ways to easily adjust habits, and clarifies how to solve the problems in life, such as “can’t persist”, “can’t put into action” and “can’t quit a smoke”. Habitual problems such as “give up” and “can’t change”.
Excellence is not an act, but a habit. The book is suitable for those who want to develop good habits but can’t find a scientific method, and teach them to reshape themselves with habits.
Cultivate mini habits and achieve a better individual. Yet, why is it so hard for us to change our habits? “If we can stick to what we want to do, we can change our life.” I think everyone will agree with this.
However, the problem is that if we simply rely on willpower to force ourselves to change our habits, we will feel that life is very painful, and eventually, we will not be able to persist. Therefore, if you want to change your habits, you must find out the crux that prevents them from changing.
Habits include two types, one is the visible external habits, and the other is the invisible recessive habits hidden deep in thinking and emotion. We can observe the habit iceberg model below and analyze the deep structure of habits from six levels.
The first level is the behavioral level. In the habit iceberg model, superficial phenomena such as “unable to put into action” and “unable to persevere” are the first layer of habits exposed on the “sea surface”.
Specifically, if we want to solve problems such as “can’t persist in learning English”, “can’t get up early”, or “can’t quit drinking”, we can think about whether there are any skills and methods to change from the level of behavioral habits.
At a deeper level, there are still factors that hinder the realization of “habitation”. This requires us to turn our attention to the second level of the habit iceberg model.
The second level is the thinking level. There may be such a kind of people around us, they are more extreme when evaluating things either giving 0 points or 100 points. Such people are extreme perfectionists.
People with this habit of thinking will aim to achieve 100 points when they act, so they will feel a lot of pressure in everything they do, and their actions will become sluggish. Plus, if they can’t keep going within a day or two, they can sink into self-loathing and give up trying. It’s suggested that such people can try to change the way they think about problems, avoid perfectionism, and let themselves act quickly.
The third level is the emotional level. There are various patterns of behavior and thinking, and so too do our emotions. It calls the “Emotional Habits” pattern.
Whenever we talk about habits, we emphasize that we need to focus on our inner emotions, why would you say that? This is because we can all go on with pleasurable things but not with painful ones.
Thus, how can we use the power of good emotions to maintain good habits? How can we break bad habits? How are our lives driven by emotions? It suggests that you can try to analyze your own emotional type first.
The fourth level is the conceptual level. Think about it, what triggers emotions? If it is explained by the habit iceberg model theory, it is the “idea” at the fourth level. For example, if you have beliefs like “I can’t do anything well” or “I’m worse than other people,” then the emotions that occupy you are feelings of powerlessness, self-loathing, and hopelessness. The negativity that comes with this negativity will stop you from taking action.
On the contrary, if you have positive concepts such as “I will do affirmative action” and “I will get results as long as I work hard”, then positive emotions such as self-affirmation, hope, courage, etc. will arise spontaneously and become the natural motivation for your actions. drive.
The fifth level is the essential level. At the bottom of the habit iceberg is Essence. Each of us has a personality trait or natural urge that is difficult to change even as we age. As the saying goes, “Three years old is old”, personality temperament and natural desires are innate, and fundamentally drive our actions and habits.
For instance, when people want to adopt a habit of learning English. People who want to build good relationships with others can experience the joy of learning as long as they find a teacher or partner who is in tune with them; The enthusiasm for learning has already been ignited; those who value the desire to be thoughtful and well-prepared will vigorously collect various learning methods and teaching materials in order, to sum up, the most effective learning methods for themselves.
Some people may feel that habit-forming has nothing to do with desire but perseverance. They always ignore their true desires, either adopting learning methods that are not suitable for them or copying the practices of people with different personalities. However, please don’t forget that everyone has their own way of winning, and only when you find the way that suits you can you really stick to it.
The sixth level is the environmental level. Our behavior, thinking, emotions, ideas, etc. are deeply influenced by the living environment in which we live. For example, every company has its own corporate culture with corresponding values and codes of conduct, which have a strong influence on us.
When we were young, we were influenced by our family and school environment; after entering society, we were more influenced by the company environment. As the saying goes, “nurture determines a person’s character.” Ideas and the courage to break through.
The specific of each habit level proof and more examples will be explained in detail in another articles I will release in series of the column for next, or you also can do a research about the habits or read the books by yourself. Of course, what I have provided or shared here just some idea or thought that be able to help you to ignite and activate your potential knowledges and skills by your own traits. See you in my next article we will continue to discuss more about the habits.